Life of a normal person is spent in constantly pushing pains
and attracting pleasures. He attempts to repeat pleasurable experiences and
becomes addicted to those objects, people and situations that have given him
pleasure. He fiercely tries to hold on to them simultaneously avoiding all that
is unpleasant and goes through all the stress that is involved in the process.
For example when he dose not succeed in getting the objects of pleasure, he
falls into an emotional turmoil creating agitation in mind. Sometimes in his
madness for seeking pleasure and avoiding pain, he ignores the needs and
concerns of others and thus creates a conflict in his relationships. Sometimes
in the pursuit of pleasure he acts in a way which he knows is against his
consciousness and better judgement. Thus he creates internal conflicts also.
Thus a person revolving in the wheel of pleasure and pain having attraction to
pleasure and aversion to pain, inevitably and constantly remains under stress
and realizes at the end of his life that it was all a futile race he was
running although and he has wasted his whole life in these vain pursuits.
Characteristics of Pleasure and Pain
To be able to separate oneself from the clutches of pleasure
and pain, first it is essential to understand the nature and philosophy of
pleasure and pains which we frequently come across in this changing world of
names and forms. Following points make a humble attempt in this direction.
Pleasure and Pain Are Inseparable
from Each Other:
Pleasure and pain are twins. They are two face of the same
coin. Where one is there the other is also bound to be present. This is inbuilt
in the nature of worldly things that pleasures obtain by them are mixed with
pain. No great illustrations are required to prove this. We are experiencing it
daily in our day to day life.
Pleasure and Pain Are Transitory in
Nature:
This means that neither pleasure nor pain is permanent. They
are fleeting, ever changing and shifting. Pleasurable objects and experiences
can’t remain permanently with us and in the same state. This is because of the
ever changing nature of the world where nothing remains static. If everything
changes and perishes in due course, then how the pleasures and pains obtained
by them can remain permanent. They provide only momentary thrill till you are
in contact with them.
Pleasure Ceases to Be Pleasure After
Sometimes:
It is a common experience of our life that the same thing
cannot give pleasure for a long time. For example suppose you are very anxious
to eat some sweets. For some time you will relish this experience very much.
But a stage will come when you wouldn’t want it any more and if it is given
forcefully, you will rather feel repulsion and vomit. To quote another example,
suppose you are very excited and keen to visit some place. Initially, you will
enjoy the experience and obtain great pleasure but a stage will come when you
start feeling bored to remain at that place. You would like to return from
there. So this is with all pleasures. They are short-lived and satisfy only
temporarily and turn into boredom or dryness after sometime. In other words, we
can say that every experience of pleasure
has a peak beyond which it no more remains a pleasure.
The More Pleasure You Get, the More
You Want:
This is another nature of worldly pleasures that the
temporary enjoyment you get from these pleasures, makes you more restless and
desperate to repeat those pleasurable experiences again and again. The more you
repeat the experience, the more your desperation to repeat it further grows on
and on until you are totally taken over and destroyed by them. Pleasures never satisfy a person, it only
leads to a more desperate search for pleasure. It is like an itch that
increases when scratched, like a fire that increases as more fuel is poured on
it. In fact attachment to pleasure is like an addiction where we constantly
seek higher and higher levels of pleasure to satisfy our needs.
Endless Race in running After Objects
of Pleasure:
After you get bored from an object of pleasure after some
time, the matter does not end here. You do not remain silent after that. Then
you start searching for another object of pleasure. Mind constantly wants to be
tickled by a variety of pleasing sensations. To quote an example, suppose you
desire to eat an ice cream cone. After your desire of eating ice cream cone is
fulfilled you get a momentary satisfaction. But soon after this your mind will
begin to search for another object of pleasure. You start thinking, what should
I do now? May be I should go to a movie. You fulfil this desire and again a
momentary satisfaction is realized, only to make you dissatisfied again and
seek something new.
In this way your mind is kept constantly busy restless and
your whole life is consumed in the process of pursuing one satisfaction after
another. You find little island of enjoyment in the midst of preponderance of
restlessness.
Pleasure Is in the
Mind, Not in the Objects:
Mind plays a vital role in the enjoyment of pleasures. It is
in the mind where we feel pleasure. Objects play a secondary role. Suppose
while enjoying a pleasure you hear some sad news, or some horrible thought of
fear arises in your mind suddenly, then the same pleasure immediately loses all
its charm. Similarly if your mood is not well then you can’t enjoy a pleasure
in a similar manner. In a similar way, pains by various worldly objects and
events are essentially felt in mind. Depending upon how you react to them and
whether you take them lightly or seriously, you can diminish or increase the
pain in your mind.
More Time Is Spent in
Pursuing After Pleasures Than in Actually Enjoying Them:
It is a general experience that a person who constantly runs
after pleasures, spends most of his time in pursuing them and has little time to
enjoy them. He lives in a state of uneasiness and unrest and loses so much
energy in the pursuit of pleasure that even when he gets the objects of
pleasure, he is not able to enjoy it fully. If after pursuing, he does not
acquire the object of his pleasure, you can easily think about his mental
state.
Actual Pleasure Is
Always Less Than The Imagined Pleasure:
It is our general experience that actual pleasure obtained
by us by contact with an object, person, place or a situation is always less
than what we had imagined. Imagination always projects things in exaggerated
and magnified form, different from the reality.
Amount of Pain
Coupled with Pleasure Is Much More Than The Pleasure Initially Enjoyed:
Although as we have mentioned earlier, every pleasure is
mixed with pain yet if you examine carefully you will realize that the quantum
of pain associated with pleasures is much more than the amount of pleasure
associated with them. Some amount of pain you have to suffer initially in the
efforts of pursuing the object of pleasure and some pain you suffer after the
pleasing experience is over as its consequence.
For example suppose you desire to have some spicy food or
snacks to satisfy the craving of your tongue. Now initially you will have to
undergo the pain of going up to the required shop. Then you will have to wait
there in the queue till your number comes. You may also have a fight there with
the waiter or any other person for not cooperating in the matter of giving you
the food at the right time and in the right manner or not giving you a proper
seat. After the food comes, you may find that some article of food is not well
prepared. Any way you finally eat the food and after having that momentary
pleasure, the later consequences will be that spicy and oily food may have some
adverse effect on your health. Your stomach may go unwell; you may have
indigestion, heart burning and nausea etc. Another pain you may suffer is the
mental urge and impulse to repeat that pleasurable experience of eating again.
To quote another example, suppose you are attached to a
person and want to live with him. Now even after you manage to live with
him/her, you also come across many other facets of his behaviour/habits which
pinch you and you have to bear with them. Further when such a person leaves
your company after some time due to any unavoidable circumstances or even
leaves you for the time being, you suffer further mental agony of his/her
separation.
Then How Can You Find
Real Happiness?
From the above discussion, you will be absolutely clear that
no permanent satisfaction can be found in pleasures of the world. They can only increase the restlessness and
agitation of one’s mind. Then how to attain real happiness and peace of mind?
Real happiness does not reside in the objects but in the
state of mind which is independent of these objects. It (true happiness) is an
intrinsic property of our inner self and can be tapped if we learn to turn our
attention from the external world to the inner world (our true self) off and on
by meditation. Most people feel that without objects to strive after, we would
be in a state of emptiness or boredom. This misconception is based upon viewing
objects as the source of gratification in the world. They do not have the realization that joy can be experienced without
objects. Real source of joy, peace and happiness is within us and we do not
have to run after anyone or anywhere to get it.
However, it does not mean that we should abandon the world
or hate material objects. Material objects, themselves, are not the problem; it
is our attachment towards them which creates problem. Yoga encourages a healthy
attitude towards material objects. We are encouraged to enjoy the experience
and to utilize material objects to accomplish our goals, but should avoid
becoming attached to them. We should use them as our servants and not allow
them to become our masters and dominate us.
Once we develop detachment and dispassion towards worldly
objects and events, then pleasure and pain automatically lose hold on us. We are
released from the right rein of pleasure and pain. We develop a deep attitude
of equanimity towards all pleasures and pains and remain equipoise in most
adverse circumstances, neither elated by gains, nor depressed by losses.
Hence rather than becoming attached to the sensation of pleasures
and trying to hold on to it while pushing pain away, simply witness them like a
detached observer and take note of their coming and passing with full control
on your mind.
